Horrabridge Combined Service Group are enjoying a list of advisories on adapting to civvy street on their Facebook page, started by Ian Mulholland. Some examples …
• Do not put creases in your jeans.
• In the real world, being able to do lots of press-ups will not lead to automatic promotion.
• Shouting “Naked Bar” at your works Christmas party will have no effect.
• The size of the dump you took yesterday will not be funny regardless of how big it was, how much it burned, how much it smelled or how clear the photo is.
• You can’t make fun of someone for their disability, no matter how funny the ailment is.
• If your arse is sore, don’t ask your colleague on the next desk if he can see what’s wrong with it.
• One day, you will have to pay for the things that keep you alive: heat, light, shelter, food, doctor, etc, etc. Buying a £30,000 car on a £16,000 a year salary is a really, really stupid idea. Spending money on video games instead of on nappies makes you a ****.
• Making fun of your neighbour to his face for being fat will not make you popular in the neighbourhood.
On “real jobs” …
• They really can fire you. On the flip side you really can quit.
• Sport is no longer part of your working week. Wednesday afternoons are for work, just like every other afternoon
And finally …
11. Read the contracts before you sign them – remember what happened the first time…!
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